Tudum...

(As always, my titles aren't always related to the content.) Anyways, I'm so disappointed lately on how career is going. Basically, I'm not even progressing at all as a nurse who's been a Band 5 for 5 years now. I might've not mentioned it here but I failed 2 interviews for my ward last year, due to "someone more experienced than me" (but we are training that person instead to do her job to teach us instead), and "giving negative vibes" in my answer that didn't even dwell on the short staffing of the ward. To be honest, I totally don't know what's happening because this all seemed like a joke. We lost a couple of seniors in the ward, but barely replaced them. The one they promoted just got the permanent position (which is expected), and now they're opening a secondment for 6 months. LIKE, SIX MONTHS? That's pretty useless tbf. Me being a prideful human being, doesn't want to apply for it because it's just useless. And potentially not getting the job would just be rubbing more salt to the wound. I'm trying not to think about other stuff, but it seems like some people don't favour me at all. I love my job, and I'm just here to work and not be best friends with other people. But I think that people who are worthy for a certain position should be given a chance. Sadly, I already showed them that I could do the job. They're just way too blind to see or probably erased that memory in their heads. Work loyalty is BS. Everyone is literally telling that to me. Even though I like what I do, I just feel like floating in the band 5 position, hitting the roof with no chance to soar above that. Instead, I'm expected to act like a senior staff nurse, when I even ain't one. I had to do some responsibility of looking after new staff and teaching them, when there is an actual person paid to do it (the one they chose over me.) Just funny, isn't it? I want to leave my area tbh and do something different. And get paid better, with the hardwork I'm putting into. I want to be appreciated in my job, and get the proper pay for it. MAybe too much to ask for other people, but they won't know how I'm feeling. I shouldn't be ranting in my college blog tbh. But hey, this is my reality. I should write more about my experiences as the nurse that I am now.